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LibertyBob.com

Not your candidate

Interview with the LibertyBob Psychic Department

2004-03-04

Category: prose

From time to time, I have posted on this site interviews with various people. Often, the people involved were not capable of being physically present. For those interviews, I have had the help of my psychics. Since you folks may be curious about these mental marvels, I thought I would interview them.

Well, they are psychic. They knew I was planning to do an interview and, in anticipation of that, they sent me the answers to the questions I was going to have asked. (Please pardon any problems with verb tense when I’m talking with or about precognitive persons.)

Here are their answers.
  • There are nine of us. Four women and four men. Yes, that does seem odd.
  • I felt very isolated as a child. I think it was the cardboard box under the stairs.
  • 7
  • Colonel Mustard in the lavatory with a hooker.
  • Bin who?
  • The Power Ball will be twelve.
  • John Kerry? Why would you ask that?
  • The Oscar will go to Mel Gibson for his original film The Enlightenment of the Buddha
  • That would definitely have to be President Mary Kate Olsen and Vice President Ashley.
  • No, she won’t.
  • No, it doesn’t matter how many times you ask.
  • I said no.
  • He will be executed for crimes against humanity.
  • And disco.
  • Bush will almost have his Constitutional Amendment but his boy toy will talk him out of it.
  • John Kerry.
  • You don’t want to know.

With that, the psychics say I was going to have choked on my beverage, fallen over, and crushed my skull. Good thing they knew how to keep the boss alive. I love having psychics on the staff!


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