Complaining About Doctors
2011-04-06
Category: GeneralAs a rule, I do not trust medical people. I've known too many of them that weren't worth a damn. Over the years, a few have earned my trust. The neurologist who gets my regular payments for services last year is not on that list.
My cardiologist, who is on the list of exceptional doctors, decided that I needed a sleep study. That's where they wire you up and then watch while you sleep to see how bad you are at it. They found that I average twenty-eight disruptions an hour when I should be getting my best sleep. The solution is a CPAP machine.
The CPAP (Continuous Passive Air Pressure) machine forces air into a mask one wears over the nose when sleeping. It makes breathing more efficient. That way, if you relax to the point that you aren't breathing, or if you have an airway obstruction, you are still getting your lungs filled. The CPAP worked great and I get much better sleep now.
The computers in the sleep study generated a printed listing of the results. This printout also contained the interpretation of the results. When the neurologist explained things to me, he seemed incapable of saying anything that wasn't preprinted on the report. Any question put to him drove him back to the report. He gave me the impression that he was just some guy reading the printout without really knowing what was going on.
I saw the text and graphs on the report. It was very clear and easy to understand. One would wonder if it really required a physician to make sense of it.
True, at one point a team of neurologists, sleep specialists, and compute people got together and created the hardware and software needed for the report. I'm sure they are well worth what they were paid. There is a good chance that the hundred and fifty I pay to the neurologist's office every month (after insurance) is going to pay for that equipment.
Still, when the doctor has to refer back to a simple report to answer a question, one doesn't feel comfortable parting with that much cash. When it is time to be studied again, I may shop around a bit. I recommend that you do the same.
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Baby Food Prank
2010-11-21
Category: craftsFirst, let me make this point very clearly. This prank is a wonderful HYPOTHETICAL prank, but under no circumstances should you ever actually do this. I mean it, seriously. Do not do this. It could easily result in an unwelcome visit from your local version of Child Protective Services. Of course, that doesn't mean the idea isn't funny.
Imagine that you have been asked to babysit an infant who eats baby food. You know the kind of baby food: strained carrots and such. Naturally, you will want to be diligent and feed the child before the parents get home. This is where the fun starts.
Again, do not actually do this. So, you retrieve from your pocket a small container of non-toxic glitter. Silver glitter works best. Make sure that the glitter does not have sharp sides or corners; you want it round and easy to digest.
You read that right, easy to digest. The next step is to mix the glitter into the baby food. Now, the child may or may not respond to the glitter. That isn't important, as long as you can get the ankle-biter to shove all does his or her gullet. When you are finished, clean all the glitter so the parents won't expect anything.
The bad news is that you may not be there for the payoff. The idea has to do it. Imagine the reaction from the parents the next time they have to change a diaper and see the sparkly payload.
Now, some of you may think that you could hypothetically replace glitter with tinsel. This is not a good idea. There are countless stories of pets that have eaten tinsel. When it comes out the back end, it never comes completely out. Instead, it trails behind, making a mess wherever the pet goes. To complete the removal, the pet owner must pull the tinsel out, often causing a tinsel cut. Think of it as a paper-cut on the inside of your colon that continues out your anus. That is not a pleasant thought.
An associate of mine, whom I'll call D.M (for his own self-respect), has a slight variation on the prank. He suggests feeding the child strained beets without letting the parents know you are going to do this. He further suggests that you casually mention a new form of cholera or similar disease that causes intestinal bleeding. I don't think this is as funny as the glitter thing, but it is in the class of baby food pranks.
Now it is your turn. What theoretical, non-harmful prank can you think of that involves baby food? Put the thought in your head and let is percolate in your subconscious. You know you want to.
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Lentil Soup Recipe
2010-11-21
Category: craftsLentils are healthful, versatile, and cheap. I like those qualities in a food. Lentils are a great source of protein without carbohydrates, which is great for diabetics.
I use this because it is simple, fast, and the leftovers will keep for a while in the fridge. I use frozen vegetables to keep the sodium down and because they are cheap and available in a wide variety. The mushrooms are not frozen; they do not freeze well.
Except for the last ten minutes, cook covered. Uncover for step 6.
- Bring 3 cups of water to a boil
- Add half a cup of rinsed Lentils and half a cup of chopped mushrooms and return to boil for five minutes
- Add one quarter cup of frozen diced green peppers and half a cup of frozen Peas and Carrots blend. Return to boil.
- Reduce heat to just below a boil and let cook for ten minutes.
- Add one quarter cup (approximate) of your favorite greens, or whatever is handy. I also will add half a teaspoon of Mrs. Dash Extra Spicy blend.
- Cook for another ten minutes.
- Remove from heat and serve. I usually pour it over a bowl of crushed crackers or corn chips and then add shredded sharp cheddar.
Refrigerate leftovers and microwave to reheat.
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Been Gone a While
2010-11-21
Category: GeneralAs you may have noticed, old LibertyBob has been a bit inactive lately. Technically, I've just been inactive on this site; the rest of my existence has been very hectic. With the new job, and some teaching on the side, and working on my graduate degree in Economics, I've had little time for anything. As the semester ends, I hope to get back to my regular ramblings. If nothing else, my ad revenue has really dropped off.
The really sad part of being off the blog all this time is that I missed the mid-term elections. Mind you, I voted and all, but there was some neat stuff to talk about. Despite the change from one party having power to another, voters pretty much voted the same way they did last time. They were just angry and voted against whoever was in power already, just like last time.
Anyway, expect a little more content. The semester is ending so I'll have more time. Winter is on its way as well, so there'll be less time on the beach connecting with the babes. Stay tuned.
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Textbook Ordeal
2010-09-05
Category: GeneralAs mentioned in earlier posts, your old pal LibertyBob is back in grad school. Things are going rather well, for the most part. The only exception was one of the textbooks.
Textbooks for college are very expensive. There are reasons for this, but it doesn't make it easy on the students. That's why we now have many ways to get used books or even rent them for the semester.
For particular books, I prefer to buy them because I expect to use them for reference in the future. When I buy, I want them new. This reduces the chance that the previous owner damaged them or did anything gross between the pages. This is particularly true when I have to order them without looking at them first.
This time, I ordered through the Barnes and Noble web site. Normally, I have really good luck with Barnes and Noble. This is the first time I ordered something that went through one of the partners. I won't be doing that again.
The book is one I will keep for reference. I was willing to pay the full price for a new copy. I paid my one hundred and seventy dollars for it. I ordered with plenty of time before the semester started; ordering it the same day I found out what it was.
As the semester drew closer, I grew more worried. The book failed to arrive. More days passed without the book. The semester started and still no book.
My email to the partner garnered a response of it may take the full fourteen days. Given that it had already been more than two weeks since I placed my order in the Barnes and Noble web site, I was not happy.
So, the book eventually arrived. The first homework was due that very night. I got things done and submitted, but was not happy about the close call.
Then there was the other problem. Notice that I said I was willing to pay full price for a new book? One would assume a new book would not be pre-underlined. I also expect that a new book would need to have the spine properly opened rather than opening freely. Used books sell for appreciably less than new ones.
I've contacted Barnes and Noble about the issue. In addition to everything else I told them, I mentioned that I would never be ordering through one of their partners again. Regular orders through Barnes and Noble would be fine; they've always given good service. Those partners are just too much of an unknown.
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