The Last Debate

2004-10-13

Category: politics

We're preparing for the final Presidential Debate tonight. This aught to be a good one. They're supposed to talk about domestic issues. Since many of you probably didn't know that Bush and Kerry were roommates, I thought I would list a few of the issues they have to deal with.

1. Bush never puts the toilet seat back down when done.
2. Kerry keeps knocking Bush's cowboy hat off the hat stand.
3. Every time Bush finds Kerry's botox needles, he calls the DEA.
4. Bush plays loud music whenever Kerry and Edwards are having a "quiet moment".
5. Bush makes a big show of yawning any time Kerry speaks.
6. Kerry can never decide which TV show to watch.
7. Bush will tie a sock on the doorknob when Laura comes over but he never removes it. As a result, Kerry has to sleep in his car.
8. They eat each other's food. (The exception is salad dressing. Kerry likes French and Bush likes ranch.)
9. It takes three hours for Kerry to make fun of Bush for stammering.
10. Bush shortens the legs on the table so Kerry's legs won't fit beneath.
11. Bush occasionally pulls Kerry on top of him and calls for the Secret Service to rough Kerry up.

I hope that helps clear things up for you.

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